Key Takeaways
- Ashley Tisdale, an L.A.-based actress, wrote a first-person piece about leaving her toxic mom group
- The article sparked a discussion about the toxicity levels of mom groups and the importance of setting boundaries
- Mom groups can be fleeting and often centered around a specific stage in life, making it common for members to grow out of them
- Lasting mom groups tend to have a concrete base, such as a shared interest in philanthropy, fashion, or gardening
- It’s essential to find a mom group that aligns with your values and interests to avoid toxicity and hurt feelings
Introduction to the Controversy
For those who may have been offline, Ashley Tisdale, a well-known actress from High School Musical, recently published a first-person article in The Cut, titled "Breaking Up With My Toxic Mom Group." In the article, Tisdale describes her experience of leaving a mom group after feeling excluded from several gatherings. The story quickly gained attention, particularly because of Tisdale’s fame and the involvement of other celebrities, such as Hilary Duff, Mandy Moore, and Meghan Trainor, in the mom group. The article sparked a heated discussion about the toxicity levels of mom groups and who was right to ditch whom.
The Expectation of Connection
However, it’s possible that Tisdale’s story is simpler than it seems. Perhaps she was expecting a connection that wasn’t actually there to begin with. When did the random moms we meet at parenting classes or playdates become forever friends, responsible for supporting our emotional and social needs over an extended period? It’s possible that some members of Tisdale’s mom group were just trying to establish boundaries once the initial purpose of the relationship had run its course. This process can be challenging, especially when it involves people we’ve grown close to, even if it’s just during a specific stage in life.
The Human Factor
It’s natural for Tisdale to have hurt feelings, especially when seeing Instagram posts from her former mom group friends, who seem to be having fun without her. Who wouldn’t feel left out when seeing pictures of people we once considered close friends, now enjoying activities together without us? However, it’s essential to remember that people grow apart, and it’s not uncommon for friendships to fade over time. This doesn’t mean that Tisdale won’t find new friends or a new mom group that aligns with her values and interests.
Finding New Connections
The good news for Tisdale is that she’s now free to find her inner peace and her people. There are many mom groups out there, both celebrity and civilian, and it’s possible to find one that shares her interests and values. According to Allison Weiss Brady, a philanthropist and model from Main Line Philadelphia and Miami, the lasting mom groups tend to have a concrete base, such as a shared interest in philanthropy, fashion, or gardening. These interests are not trendy or timely, and they provide a foundation for meaningful connections. Brady, who has two teenagers, recently joined a mom friend group that focuses on supporting local non-profits, and she finds it to be a positive and uplifting experience.
The Importance of Shared Interests
Brady’s experience highlights the importance of shared interests in creating lasting connections. When we’re part of a group that shares our passions and values, we’re more likely to form meaningful relationships that can withstand the test of time. This is particularly important for mom groups, which can be fleeting and often centered around a specific stage in life. By finding a group that aligns with our interests and values, we can avoid the toxicity and hurt feelings that can come with feeling excluded or left behind. Instead, we can focus on building positive relationships that support our emotional and social needs, both as individuals and as mothers.


