Key Takeaways:

• Care and contact orders in New Zealand’s Family Court can be rigid and inflexible, leaving children caught in the middle of parental disputes.
• Thousands of children in New Zealand face challenges during the holiday season due to Family Court orders that dictate their care arrangements.
• Parenting order applications dominate Family Court cases, with over 7,600 applications in the 2024/2025 financial year.
• Children’s needs and well-being should be the primary consideration in care and contact arrangements, with flexibility and compromise key to successful co-parenting.
• Parents should prioritize open communication, positive messaging, and role-modelling to help children navigate complex family situations.

Introduction to Care and Contact Orders
Care and contact orders are designed to balance parental rights and protect children’s welfare, but in practice, they often leave children caught in rigidity with no fluidity for movement. The Family Court in New Zealand processes a high volume of applications related to family issues, with parenting order applications consistently dominating the cases. The court’s statistics show that over 7,600 parenting order applications were filed in the 2024/2025 financial year, with more than half of the cases remaining unresolved. This highlights the challenges faced by families and children during the holiday season, particularly when it comes to care and contact arrangements.

The Reality of Family Court Orders
The story of two sisters who were told they would have to alternate Christmas celebrations with their parents every year is a stark example of the reality faced by thousands of New Zealand children. The Family Court’s orders can be rigid and inflexible, leaving children feeling caught in the middle of their parents’ disputes. For example, a judge-directed parenting order may stipulate that a child’s weekly care arrangements and special occasions like birthdays, school holidays, and Christmas Day are to be managed by each guardian in a specific way. This can lead to children feeling like they are being pulled in different directions, with no control over their own lives.

The Importance of Compromise and Flexibility
Zayne Jouma, from Family Dispute Support Services, emphasizes the importance of compromise and flexibility in care and contact arrangements. He notes that every case is different, and parents must be willing to work together to find a solution that prioritizes the child’s needs. Jouma advises parents to convey positive messaging about spending time with the other parent, especially in situations where children may be resistant to the idea. He also recommends considering an international travel clause, allowing up to three optional weeks each year, to help families navigate complex care arrangements.

The Role of Parents in Supporting Children
Richard Smith, chair of family law at the New Zealand Law Society, notes that there is no single answer to the challenges faced by families during the holiday season. Each child has their own unique needs and preferences, shaped by past experiences and family traditions. Smith emphasizes the importance of parents role-modelling appropriate behaviors and prioritizing certainty and stability for their children. He suggests that parents may need to schedule video calls, plan safe travel, and adapt to each other’s traditions to ensure that children can connect with both parents and wider family.

The Importance of Advance Planning
Principal Family Court Judge Jacquelyn Moran stresses the importance of parents considering holiday contact well in advance of December. She notes that issues relating to care and contact over the Christmas period often result in proceedings being filed at the last minute, which can lead to conflict and uncertainty. Judge Moran advises parents to be specific in their parenting plans around Christmas arrangements and to consider seeking assistance from family lawyers or other providers to reach a Parenting Agreement. By prioritizing advance planning and flexibility, parents can help reduce stress and uncertainty for their children during the holiday season.

Conclusion
In conclusion, care and contact orders in New Zealand’s Family Court can be challenging for children and families to navigate, particularly during the holiday season. By prioritizing flexibility, compromise, and open communication, parents can help reduce stress and uncertainty for their children. It is essential for parents to remember that their children’s needs and well-being should be the primary consideration in care and contact arrangements. By working together and seeking assistance when needed, parents can help create a more positive and supportive environment for their children, even in the most challenging of circumstances.